Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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