I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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