I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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