I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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