exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Randomize
