4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
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i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
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Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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