Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Girls should come with a carfax report
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize