I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
