Texts From Last Night

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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.

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  (479): Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits. http://tfl.nu/uo57
  Replies (13) Good night (579) Bad night (3054)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas

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  (814): he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas http://tfl.nu/93o8
  Replies (13) Good night (1803) Bad night (4652)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.

  (217): View more from Illinois

  gotta love wednesdays

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  (309): In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st. (217): gotta love wednesdays http://tfl.nu/3grc
  Replies (21) Good night (4118) Bad night (1003)
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  (818): View more from California

  his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up

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  (818): his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up http://tfl.nu/dywv
  Replies (13) Good night (1075) Bad night (4815)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?

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  (512): will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you? http://tfl.nu/0iy8
  Replies (18) Good night (5744) Bad night (784)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.

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  (443): she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise. http://tfl.nu/igb9
  Replies (9) Good night (2281) Bad night (752)
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  (845): View more from New York

  Did you bedazzle the elevator?

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  (845): Did you bedazzle the elevator? http://tfl.nu/4rct
  Replies (2) Good night (3365) Bad night (682)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him

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  (216): there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him http://tfl.nu/zgop
  Replies (1) Good night (1193) Bad night (729)
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  (936): View more from Texas

  im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done

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  (936): im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done http://tfl.nu/rjb2
  Replies (2) Good night (787) Bad night (524)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.

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  (970): We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest. http://tfl.nu/w1i7
  Replies (16) Good night (2587) Bad night (686)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.

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  (503): You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure. http://tfl.nu/1pyv
  Replies (2) Good night (722) Bad night (285)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.

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  (651): Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year. http://tfl.nu/7b82
  Replies (2) Good night (424) Bad night (257)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"

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  (774): Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be" http://tfl.nu/8qrq
  Replies (0) Good night (478) Bad night (186)
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  (559): View more from California

  You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka

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  (559): You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka http://tfl.nu/lf1o
  Replies (0) Good night (502) Bad night (205)
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  (956): View more from Texas

  Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.

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  (956): Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair. http://tfl.nu/7p18
  Replies (1) Good night (488) Bad night (272)

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