Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
