i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
