No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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