we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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