belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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