You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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