do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
