she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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