he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
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