she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
