I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize