do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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