you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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