CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
