remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
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