I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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