Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I need moral support for this bender
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
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