I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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