the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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