I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize