Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy. http://tfl.nu/3jyj
  Replies (22) Good night (1626) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Awesome. Ask her out.

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (224): Awesome. Ask her out. (815): Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her. http://tfl.nu/pquv
  Replies (14) Good night (660) Bad night (1740)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her. http://tfl.nu/gotu
  Replies (58) Good night (3928) Bad night (1108)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint. http://tfl.nu/divk
  Replies (25) Good night (9319) Bad night (1348)
• Favorite

  (846): View more from

  he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (846): he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand. http://tfl.nu/15lw
  Replies (14) Good night (1673) Bad night (5203)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!" http://tfl.nu/rdw8
  Replies (9) Good night (1400) Bad night (3028)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop. http://tfl.nu/iw16
  Replies (20) Good night (3765) Bad night (1518)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years? http://tfl.nu/xhbr
  Replies (3) Good night (1382) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex. http://tfl.nu/pzxj
  Replies (5) Good night (1901) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON http://tfl.nu/ic7e
  Replies (17) Good night (1593) Bad night (422)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time. http://tfl.nu/yqup
  Replies (1) Good night (376) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!" http://tfl.nu/2v59
  Replies (0) Good night (838) Bad night (329)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.

  (1-802): View more from Vermont

  A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars. (1-802): A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning. http://tfl.nu/iq00
  Replies (6) Good night (1799) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies. http://tfl.nu/nh48
  Replies (1) Good night (636) Bad night (285)
• Favorite

  (235): View more from

  if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?

  (366): View more from

  except your soul

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (235): if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right? (366): except your soul http://tfl.nu/vptx
  Replies (1) Good night (504) Bad night (623)

Randomize