Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  i jhust puked up my retainher.

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  (313): i jhust puked up my retainher. http://tfl.nu/zdlf
  Replies (3) Good night (631) Bad night (1260)
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  (132): View more from

  if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder

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  (132): if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder http://tfl.nu/48fa
  Replies (43) Good night (1348) Bad night (841)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow

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  (989): i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow http://tfl.nu/zmy7
  Replies (11) Good night (2046) Bad night (745)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings

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  (901): oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass (901): fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings http://tfl.nu/b0u6
  Replies (118) Good night (4350) Bad night (1326)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...

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  (812): Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people... http://tfl.nu/4gx3
  Replies (16) Good night (2211) Bad night (5691)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.

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  (204): this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food. http://tfl.nu/5ycb
  Replies (9) Good night (1417) Bad night (4294)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision

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  (702): Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision http://tfl.nu/1pgb
  Replies (21) Good night (4632) Bad night (584)
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  (914): View more from New York

  He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF

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  (914): He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF http://tfl.nu/rz1g
  Replies (19) Good night (3788) Bad night (1428)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.

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  (603): Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic. http://tfl.nu/b5pl
  Replies (2) Good night (1785) Bad night (502)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.

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  (414): Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter. http://tfl.nu/rhw8
  Replies (7) Good night (1223) Bad night (401)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...

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  (919): So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea... http://tfl.nu/bj54
  Replies (6) Good night (448) Bad night (1444)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.

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  (508): It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law. http://tfl.nu/9zdw
  Replies (8) Good night (1119) Bad night (443)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"

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  (817): I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV" http://tfl.nu/rps9
  Replies (7) Good night (858) Bad night (391)
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  (760): View more from California

  Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.

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  (760): Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back. http://tfl.nu/zq1q
  Replies (1) Good night (754) Bad night (261)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.

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  (216): Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me. http://tfl.nu/fau7
  Replies (3) Good night (1058) Bad night (231)

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