Texts From Last Night

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  (646): View more from New York

  We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.

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  (646): We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat. http://tfl.nu/ozyu
  Replies (5) Good night (3044) Bad night (514)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.

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  (512): last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all. http://tfl.nu/2zyx
  Replies (11) Good night (3703) Bad night (916)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.

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  (706): Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully. http://tfl.nu/qn1h
  Replies (119) Good night (12540) Bad night (1286)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  I love having hate sex.

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  (705): I love having hate sex. http://tfl.nu/fz63
  Replies (43) Good night (5384) Bad night (907)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....

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  (706): You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there.... http://tfl.nu/cfkl
  Replies (10) Good night (3875) Bad night (941)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.

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  (864): I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized. http://tfl.nu/3fi2
  Replies (7) Good night (1613) Bad night (2761)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?

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  (701): Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire? http://tfl.nu/pmju
  Replies (3) Good night (1536) Bad night (2080)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.

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  (920): He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start. http://tfl.nu/5fft
  Replies (3) Good night (808) Bad night (2896)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.

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  (+61): There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye. http://tfl.nu/nvha
  Replies (1) Good night (1618) Bad night (1349)
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  (408): View more from California

  You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.

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  (408): You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you. http://tfl.nu/r2tt
  Replies (2) Good night (1548) Bad night (594)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.

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  (207): Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something. http://tfl.nu/ppvg
  Replies (12) Good night (1169) Bad night (699)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point

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  (561): I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point http://tfl.nu/m5fj
  Replies (3) Good night (1295) Bad night (430)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  When did angry sex become our thing?

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  (815): When did angry sex become our thing? http://tfl.nu/g3vv
  Replies (3) Good night (877) Bad night (382)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.

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  (313): From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours. http://tfl.nu/36vr
  Replies (4) Good night (1088) Bad night (711)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?

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  (208): So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow? http://tfl.nu/wzsh
  Replies (6) Good night (697) Bad night (476)

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