I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
and you fell through a lawn chair
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize