New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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