My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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