After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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