just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
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Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.