Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
