I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
