Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...