I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize