it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
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