Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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