anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
