I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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