well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I don't think brook has ever known best
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Randomize