I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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