So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
