She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Randomize
