Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I just blew my weed a kiss
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.