yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
