Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
