She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
