I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize